


the absolute transparency of the boy

by macbethattempest



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, The Balloon Squad (SKAM), Yousana, and kindergarten and party and what-not scenarios, pure and absolute fluff, with balloon squad happiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-12
Updated: 2017-07-12
Packaged: 2018-12-01 09:17:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11483331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/macbethattempest/pseuds/macbethattempest
Summary: the question is: who knows that Yousef Acar is hopelessly in love with Sana Bakkoush?the answer to which is simple: everybody and everything, even the air in the Bakkoush kitchenOR5 times Yousef Acar was too obvious for his own good





	the absolute transparency of the boy

**Author's Note:**

> first skam and yousana fic, lets go

**#1.**  
  
The very first time Yousef tells somebody he loves Sana Bakkoush is when he loses FIFA because he gets way too distracted.

Now, Yousef _always_ wins. Its the rule of law.

When he was fourteen, he bet and beat Elias' elder brother in a straight 4-0 white wash. Once, Yousef fractured his dominant hand and still outdid the entirety of Elvebakken at FIFA. In another, he had pneumonia and lied in bed all day being miserable. To cheer himself up, he beat Elias thrice, cribbing all the time about how it wasn't even tough anymore, and then promptly fainted. On Eid last year, Adam and Mutta had messed up his controller settings and he'd adapted to the new settings in seconds, winning both the game and the 500kroner haul of the fest bet.

So it was catastrophic, not to say an event of the rarest kind, when Yousef lost a match to a group of boys from the neighborhood, losing a chunk of money from Elias' pocket and balloon squad's esteemed bragging rights.

See, it hadn't exactly been Yousef's fault. He wasn't even the overconfident kind. He was the best for a reason: he was cautious and never underestimated an opponent. In all reality, the fault was Elias Bakkoush's younger sister's.

Sana Bakkoush was an absolute enigma. She was what she was. Some people called her a bitch, Yousef agreed. She got things done. She was extremely efficient. She was straightforward and she never cowered. If people labeled that as bitch, _sure_. Yousef called it being powerful and fierce and fearless. Sana was to-the-point but kind. She was suspicious of people but valued loyalty above everything else.

Sana Bakkoush was an absolute goddess and Yousef could wax poetic about her every single second.

He could count on his fingers, the number of times he had seen her wear anything but monochrome colors: on Eid, she'd worn pink pants; on Christmas, she'd worn a red sweater; on the first day of winter in 2015, she'd worn a bright blue jacket.

So when that day, Sana Bakkoush walked in the room, wearing a bright yellow hijab, Yousef froze. He _literally_ froze. His fingers stopped moving on the buttons, he stopped blinking, and he is pretty sure he stopped breathing for a few moments. Yousef stared at Sana Bakkoush unabashedly, unable to tear his gaze, his eyes glued to her.

Sana Bakkoush looked radiant and Yousef felt like he was drowning and breathing at the same time. His heart was beating so fast: _he knew it_ , he was in love, his suspicions were correct. _Absolutely_ correct.

And then when Elias Bakkoush snatched the controller from Yousef's hand shouting, "Bro!", and tried to salvage the game--it was too late anyway--Yousef's heart had sunk. His best friend's younger sister. The label was enough.

So when Mikael had found Yousef Acar in a state of absolute despair on the porch swing at his house in the night, Mikael Øverlie had wondered what had happened and then Mikael had called Even, because god knows all those Baz Luhrmann movies had made Even an expert on tragedy.

Mikael and Even had walked out and sat on the porch swing with Yousef, silently. Mikael wasn't much for silence, though, so he'd broken it almost immediately, earning a look of cultivated distaste from Even. "Are you sad because you lost the game?", Mikael asked, confused and concerned. Losing FIFA could be a pretty big deal for Yousef.

Even chuckled and both Mikael and Yousef turned their head to him.

"Bro, I was there today", Even spoke, defending himself and still chuckling a bit. "I mean," Even gestured to his eyes. "I saw."

Yousef's eyes widened a bit and then he sighed. "Well then."

Mikael blinked, oblivious, as always. "What?"

Yousef sighed again. Mikael grew even more confused. "What's happening?" Mikael quite liked being in the loop about things, thank you very much.

Yousef sighed and stared at the sky above him.

"I'm in love with Sana."

Even laughed full out then, shaking his head. Mikael just sat there, processing. He couldn't believe it.

"Wha-", Mikael was just so confused. "Is she in Elvebakken? Do we know her? I don't think I've met any Sana at school? I mean, I know everybody at school and--"

"Mikael", Yousef interrupted, exasperated.

"Sana", Yousef enunciated the word out loud. "Sana Bakkoush."

Mikael's eyes widened.

Sana Bakkoush.

Elias' younger sister.

Sanana Banana.

 _The_ Sana Bakkoush.

"Bro", Mikael breathed, letting out all his amazement and fear and and awe in one word.

"I know", Yousef whispered back and buried his head in his hands.

Mikael turned to Even and accosted him, "how did you know?"

Even raised both his hands up defensively. "Hey, I was there today", Even said. "Yousef lost the match because he-" Even looked at Yousef to complete his sentence, and leaned close to Mikael as if telling him a secret. "Stared at Sana for way too long."

Yousef snorted. "Fuck off."

Mikael's eyes widened. "Bro", he breathed. "Oh no bro."

Even laughed harder.

Mikael raked a hand through his unruly hair. "But--" Mikael struggled to find the words. "But she's Elias' younger sister!"

Yousef scrunched his nose. "You think I don't know that, bro?", Yousef snapped. "I know she's Elias' younger sister." And then Yousef paused, seemingly contemplating something and sat up straighter. "But I'm in love with her. And I'll tell Elias all about it." Yousef nodded again and then abruptly turned to both Even and Mikael again, "but not yet!"

Mikael nodded rapidly.

Even smiled. "I won't tell if you won't."

 

 **#2.**  
  
Yousef Acar fails the mid term for biology in his final year of high school.

He's good at academics, all his teachers whole heartedly agree. But biology is something he doesn't. Fucking. Understand. Biology is an alien language. Sociology, History--any fucking subject from the Humanities--he can ace with perfect precision. Biology? Nuh uh.

And things can't get any worse.

Russ time is nearly here. It's right there, within reach. He's not going to be drinking--something that is strictly against his morals--but he is planning to have fun. He wants to go to the Elvebakken dinner fest and the concert at Hartvig Nissen. He wants to dance at the spectrum disco near Urra. He wants to decorate the bus that him, Elias, Mutta, Adam and Mikael salvaged from scraps with other friends.

It's not as if he doesn't want to study. He simply doesn't have the time to.

His Russ overalls are already here. His schedule is set by the minute and now, he needs to re-take the midterm which he knows he's going to fail again.

The situation finds him at the Bakkoush house in Elias' study--his own room and study nearly in ruins because of the renovation going on at his house--in the middle of the night, consuming copious amounts of coffee and gazing blearily at the pages of the biology book before him.

The book is talking something about DNA and it's processes. At this point in time, Yousef couldn't care less. He yawns into his hand, and nearly falls from the stool. The exam is tomorrow in the day, and Yousef knows he is going to fail. And then, he's going to have a terrible Russ time. The guilt and tension is going to eat him alive.

He yawns again and _clamp!_ shuts his mouth abruptly when he hears a crash outside.

Yousef turns in consternation, gets up from his stool and ambles outside the study, dragging his feet and half asleep.

In the dim white light, he finds a half asleep Sana Bakkoush sitting on the kitchen floor, her head leaning against the cupboards, a plastic bowl lying toppled on the ground in front of her, and a pained expression on her face.

Yousef jerks awake, his shoulders tightening. "What happened, Sana?", he asks, alarmed, his eyes darting around to look for the source of her current situation. Sana looks up blearily at him, blinks thrice and then puts her hand up to shield her eyes against the onslaught of light.

"Yousef?", she half-whispers, her voice hoarse.

Yousef silently steps over the toppled bowl and squats in front of Sana, concerned.

"What happened, Sana?", he asks again, his voice serious.

Sana swallows and her face contorts like she's in pain.

She leans a bit closer to him, her voice hoarse and low, nearly inaudible. Yousef can smell her: earthy, vibrant and a hint of raw sandalwood. He takes in deep breaths, subconsciously trying to commit the heady scent to memory.

"I sang too much", Sana speaks, her voice raw.

" _Haan_?", Yousef replies, almost certain that he heard her wrong.

Sana shakes her head. "I went to karaoke yesterday and they played Beyoncé", she pauses for effect and Yousef instinctively nears closer. "And I just couldn't help myself." Sana sighs. "I tried to do all the key changes in Love on Top." She adds and nods as if this is the most common thing in the world. "And now I have a terrible terrible throat." She touches her throat as if to emphasize her point. "It hurts to swallow and to think and to eat and to do _anything_."

Yousef blinks once. And then he blinks again.

And then he bursts out laughing, hearty and large bellows of laughter.

He cannot believe this.

It's three in the night. _It's fucking three in the night_. He's studying biology and Sana Bakkoush went too hard singing Love on Top and got a sore throat.

Sana crinkles her nose at him and pushes him in the shoulder. Yousef hardly budges. He keeps laughing hysterically, and shifts and sits next to Sana on the floor, leaning his head against the other cupboard.

Sana turns to look at him, still nearly wheezing due to laughter, and smiles a bit. "You're so weird", she says in her hoarse voice, sending Yousef in another fit of laughs.

Yousef finally calms down enough and takes deep breaths, his chest still heaving from laughing so hard. "You have to admit-", he says, his breath still short. "It is a little funny."

Sana looks to him and pinches her index finger and thumb together in the air. "A little", she says.

Yousef smiles and rests his head against the cupboard again. Laughing made him more tired than before.

In another time, when he was much less tired and mind numbingly done, he would have been hyperventilating, sitting with Sana in such close quarters. Currently, he is registering only half of what is happening.

Sana breaks the comfortable silence that has settled around them. "What are you doing here, up so late?" She picks at the nail paint on her toe nails.

Yousef runs his hand through his hair and looks at Sana. "I failed Biology", he says and Sana turns her head to look at him. "I have to re-take the midterm tomorrow and I know I'm failing again."

Sana's eyes narrow slightly.

"Then study", she says, like it's the most obvious thing in the world.

" _Ahaan_ Sana", Yousef nods rapidly. "That's so smart of you", he looks at her with comically widened eyes. "Why did not _I_ think of that?" He raises his hands up in the air and shakes his head in mock wonder again. "Wow", he says, fake impressed.

Sana laughs and Yousef turns to her and smiles involuntarily.

"I take it that you don't like biology then?", Sana asks, smiling.

Yousef raises his eyebrows. "You do?", he asks.

Sana nods her head vigorously. "I love it."

Yousef contorts his face in mock disgust and turns his face away from her. "We can't be friends anymore", he announces.

Sana laughs heartily again and Yousef turns to her, smiling so hard that his lips hurt.

"What are you studying?", she asks, still smiling.

"DNA replication in humans."

Sana's eyes light up. "And you don't understand that?"

"Nope."

Sana nods vigorously, raises her hand up and grabs a couple of napkins from the kitchen counter. She produces a pen seemingly out of nowhere and scribbles "DNA replication" on the top of the napkin.

Yousef raises his eyebrows in question at the pen in her hand and Sana puts a finger to her lips as if telling him a secret. "Magical hijab", she whispers. Yousef nods in divine understanding.

And then she takes him on the wildest and most exciting tangents of his life. She draws diagrams and labels them and creates flow charts and writes down important points and Yousef has never found anything more interesting in his entire life than he finds DNA replication in this moment. It's a story and _wow_ , biology is magic and how did he never see this before.

It's as if he has never studied biology before. Sana's voice is passionate and soft and slow and his head is cleared of everything but the clear and logical process of DNA replication. He understands it completely and fully. He sees the draw that it holds and he feels the want to know more.

As Sana's fingers draw the last line of the flowchart, effectively closing the topic, she looks up at him and her face sparkles.

"So?", she asks, her voice holding a million inflections.

He supposes that they are both a bit breathless. He blinks at her, and he feels unreal in that moment. Everything feels a bit unhinged.

He opens his mouth and is abruptly cut off as Sana's phone rings loudly. It's vibrations reverberate through the wood. Sana blinks as if she's coming out of a stupor and grabs her phone from the counter and gets up abruptly. She puts the phone to her ear.

"Halla?", she speaks hoarsely. "Eva?", she whispers and then she falls into a comfortable lapse of conversation with her. "Yes, _I know_ , my throat hurts too." She nods, her attention redirected. " _Ahaan_ , it's terrible." And she starts walking away from Yousef. She looks back at him and gives him a small smile and vanishes into her room, the door closing behind him with a click.

Yousef gives her a small smile back.

He looks down at the napkin and delicately traces the arrow joining one strand of DNA to another with his index finger. "So?", she'd asked. He looks at all the scribbles and pencil marks lining the delicate napkin paper and then he looks at his index finger, a little bit of black ink smudged on his fingertip.

" _So?_ "

Yousef looks up at the closed door of Sana's room and into the empty air, he whispers.

"I love you."

 

 **#3.**  
  
Adam, Mutta and Mikael knew all about Yousef's hopeless crush on Sana.

In an ideal world, Yousef believed, nobody was meant to know. It was a secret that only and only Yousef knew. But it most definitely wasn't a perfect world and in a fit of revelation, Yousef had told Mikael and a certain somebody, and then Mikael--as per usual--couldn't keep his mouth shut and had blurted it out to Mutta who had _"nearly died"_ (Mutta's words not Yousef's) upon hearing this, who had told Adam, who had not been surprised in the least and merely even blinked when informed about this love of Yousef's.

Upon Mutta's extreme exclamations of "the _fuck_ bro" and "how the fuck can you be so calm about this", Adam had contorted his face in disgust and flicked Mutta off, calling him "unaware", "the epitome of non perceptiveness" and saying, "it was pretty obvious from the start", going on to prove his point by saying how Yousef "nearly burst with happiness" when he saw Sana. Mutta had nearly fainted, Mikael had nearly shit himself laughing, Yousef had pretended he hadn't heard anything that had just happened but an unspoken agreement had been forged between them from the very start: not telling Elias about this.

Yousef had chickened out of telling Elias for years. He couldn't exactly go up to his best friend and tell him that he was madly and completely in love with his younger sister. That would _not_ go down well.

If anybody knew Elias even just a bit, they knew that Elias Bakkoush was incredibly protective of his family, more so of his younger sister, who he affectionately called little devil and most of Elvebakken were intimidated of, even when she didn't go to school there.

And Yousef loved Elias, he dearly did. He couldn't fathom losing his friendship with Elias over a crush. But at the same time, he knew that every moment he sought Sana, every moment he came to the Bakkoush's as Elias' friend and ended up bantering with his younger sister, every moment he texted Sana with memes, every moment he _loved_ Sana, he was doing Elias and the trust that Elias foisted upon Yousef, dirty.

But today is not the day for such best friend-to-best friend revelations. Today is the day Elias and Yousef decide on their matching tattoo.

The grass prickles Yousef's bare calves as he half-lounges on the lawn outside the Bakkoush household. The sun's out today and Adam loves "sunbathing", an activity that involves laying down on the grass under the sun and sleeping.

"I want matching tattoos before the end of the year, Yousef", Elias repeats what he's been saying since the start of the year.

Yousef nods in all agreement. He's down for matching best friend tattoos with Elias, and he's down for getting them before the end of the year. What he's not down for, is getting what Elias wants.

"Of course", Yousef replies, nudging Elias' foot with the tip of his shoe. "As soon as we agree on what we want, we'll get it."

"Bro", Elias whines, prolonging the _o_.

"Right back at ya", Yousef replies, prolonging the _a_ , pointing finger guns at Elias.

Elias huffs exasperatedly, followed by Mutta's sigh. He's heard this saga enough times to know exactly how it goes.

"Let. Us. Get. A. Flaming. Dragon.", Elias enunciates it over-exaggeratedly with pauses.

"Nuh uh", Yousef shakes his head in denial. "Let's get a subtle flower outline", Yousef says. "Whichever flower you want", Yousef waves his right hand at Elias, as if giving him a huge concession.

Elias looks up in exasperation.

The glass door leading inside opens and Sana steps outside, eyes laser focused on her phone, her nails creating a constant tap tap tap on the screen.

"Halla Sana", Mikael rolls over from under a sleeping Adam's heavy arm where he's lying on the the grass and waves to Sana.

Sana looks up from her phone, startled, clearly too engrossed in whatever is happening on her phone to notice her surroundings. She squints as the sun hits her eyes and smiles. "Halla", she says and then turns and radiantly smiles at Yousef. Yousef's eyes crinkle and he grins at her.

"Why the fuck would we get a flower?", Elias drawls, sounding completely done.

"Why the fuck would we get a flaming dragon?", Yousef counters, tearing his eyes away from Sana.

Sana frowns and leisurely walks towards them, settling down cross legged beside Elias and directly in front of Yousef, dropping her phone on the grass.

She looks at Elias, her eyebrows raised. "A flaming dragon?", she asks, eyebrows raised, well aware that Yousef and Elias are contemplating matching tattoos. The last time she'd heard them talk, Elias had been going on and on about getting a sword on their biceps and Yousef had been firmly sitting on the idea of getting small birds on their forearms.

Elias turns to her. "He wants a flower outline."

Sana looks to Yousef. "Which flower?", she asks, a smile coloring her words.

Yousef shrugs and leans forward towards Sana. " _That_ , I'm going to let Elias decide", he sighs. "Like a good friend does."

Sana laughs and turns to Elias. "I can't believe you guys still haven't decided what you want." She leans back on her palms. "How long has it been? Four months?"

Elias huffs and points his finger at Yousef. "His fault."

"It's both of yours fault", Mutta mutters tiredly, his eyes closed as he lays face up on the grass. "Fucking idiots." Mutta sighs and then blinks open his eyes. "Why don't you help them decide Sana?", he says to her, looking at her upside down.

"Why not, actually", Mikael adds, his eyes trained on his phone screen. "I'm sick of hearing them talk about this again and again." He begins typing rapidly.

Elias shrugs again like it's not his fault at all. "I want something badass", he says, popping a mint in his mouth.

"I want something pretty", Yousef says, finality in his tone.

Mutta sighs deeply. "Why don't you get a flaming dragon or whatever badass thing you want Elias--", Mutta speaks again, eyes closed. "And you get some flower or shit, Yousef?"

Elias sighs.

"Dude", Elias says, exasperated beyond words. "How is that a matching tattoo?"

Mutta grunts.

"Why don't you both get a tattoo of my face?", Sana quips.

Elias frowns and looks at her as if she's grown two heads. " _What_?"

She turns to Yousef. "A tattoo of my face", she implores him, like it's the most obvious thing in the world, her finger tracing an outline of the face in question.

"Why the fuck would we do that?", Elias asks.

Sana shrugs. "Well", she says. "Firstly, it'll be matching." She winks at Mutta who opened his eyes as soon as Sana suggested this. Mutta grins back at her.

"I can't wait to hear _secondly_ ," Mikael says, his phone closed and clutched in his palm.

_"Sana"_

Sana turns at the sound of her mother's voice coming from inside the house.

"Coming", she calls back.

"Secondly", she says, as she starts to get up, gathering her phone from the ground. "I'm pretty badass", she says to Elias, standing up, and then she turns to Yousef. "And am I not amazingly pretty?", she asks Yousef with an incandescent smile.

In the day, with the sun streaming down her face, and her face illuminated and joyful, she's not just pretty, Yousef thinks, she's brilliantly beautiful. Sana gives a small exuberant laugh, turns on her heel and waltzes back inside, closing the door with a firm thud behind her.

Yousef stares after her, mesmerized and in awe.

Mikael chuckles. "Look at Yousef's face", he says. "He would get totally Sana's face tattooed on his forehead right this instant."

Yousef freezes.

Mutta's eyes widen to the size of saucers and he kicks Mikael in the shin with his foot.

Mikael yelps and turns to Mutta, protesting and then stops as he sees Yousef's frozen face. Realization dawns on Mikael and he slowly turns his head to look at Elias.

Elias is scowling. "Yousef totally would", he huffs and bends down towards his foot to dislodge the blade of grass stuck in the middle of his toe and finger.

Yousef's eyes widen and he blinks rapidly.

"I-- I would?", he coughs out, his voice cracked.

Elias upturns his face to look at him. "Bro, I'm pretty sure you would break your own nose if Sana asked you to." Elias goes back to scratching his foot.

Mutta didn't think it was possible, but here Yousef was, making the impossible possible: Yousef's eyes seemed to widen further than humanly possible.

Yousef swallows. "Uh", Yousef shakes his head, as if to shake away the thought from his brain. "Why would you think that?"

Elias looks up at Yousef, frowning. "What?"

Yousef crinkles his nose. "I mean--", Yousef swallows again. "Why would you, uh, think _that_?"

"Think what?", Elias asks, finally straightening up. And then Elias's eyes widen in horror.

Yousef instinctively leans back. The moment was here. Yousef prepared himself to deliver apologies.

"I'm sorry", Elias spoke rapidly. "Bro, I'm sorry."

Yousef stops in his tracks. It's Yousef's turn to be confused. "What?", Yousef asks.

Elias looks around and then at the glass through which Sana went in. Elias leans in and whispers to Yousef, as if telling him a secret, "I didn't know you didn't know yet."

Yousef gets more confused. "What didn't I know?"

Elias shakes his head in fear and regret. "I have to tell him now", Elias whispers under his breath. Elias takes a deep breath. "I learned in psychology class in school that we shouldn't rush realizations and feelings in others' lives", he half-whispers, nearly mournful. "I'm sorry bro--"

"What the fuck are you talking about Elias?", Yousef cuts him off, confused and a bit concerned.

Elias sighs. "I don't want to be the one to tell you but," Elias pauses and looks around at his audience: a frozen Mikael, a rapt Mutta and a sleeping Adam and then he turns to Yousef.

" _Bro_ ", Elias says, shifting forward and places a hand on Yousef's shoulder. "You're in love with Sana."

Yousef blinks.

And then he blinks again.

"Uh", Yousef mumbles, clearly confused as to how to react to that and shrugs a little. "I know that."

Elias blinks and then straightens swiftly. "You do?", he asks, confused.

Yousef nods. "Of course," he says. "I mean-," Yousef shrugs helplessly.

Elias scrunches his eyebrows in confusion. "But then why didn't you tell me, Yousef?"

"Because--", Yousef stumbles for words. "Because I thought you'd be angry!", he exclaims.

Elias' eyebrows scrunch further. "Why would I be angry?", Elias says, bewildered.

"Because she's your _little sister_ ", Yousef exclaims. "And I'm your _best friend_!"

Elias blinks. "But you're Yousef!", Elias says. "I mean, why wouldn't I want my sister to end up with someone like you?"

Yousef gapes at Elias. He starts to speak and no words come out of his mouth. He looks around helplessly but all he sees are Mikael and Mutta watching Elias and Yousef with the same intensity as if they were watching a soap opera. He turns to Elias again, speechless.

Finally, he mumbles, "I thought you'd be angry so I just hid it."

Elias straightens and let's out a low laugh. "You _tried_ to hide it", Elias corrects Yousef, smiling. "It's the _most_ obvious thing in the world."

Yousef blinks again. And then he starts smiling slowly at Elias. "So you're okay with it?", Yousef asks, still a little hesitant.

Elias gives a full blown smile to Yousef. "As long as I get first priority."

Yousef smiles back. "We'll see about that", he quips.

Elias lets his head back and laughs.

Mikael deliberately clears his throat. Mutta, Yousef and Elias turn towards him.

"So it's confirmed then?", Mikael asks.

Yousef raises one eyebrow.

Mikael sits up at points at Yousef and Elias and then turns to Mutta.

"Are they getting Sana's face tattooed now?"

 

 **#4.**  
  
Yousef never wanted to work at a kindergarten. He loved kids, sure, but somehow, the thought of working at a kindergarten never appealed to him. That is, until the day he began working at the kindergarten. The first day, his aunt introduced him to the kids. In a week, the kids were his best friends. In a month, the kids and him were inseparable. In two months, he was contemplating whether he should start his own kindergarten as a career option.

The kids and Yousef were tight. Yousef knew everything about them and their parents had them call Yousef whenever they didn't do their simple chores or eat at home. Yousef loved it. Yousef loved how pure children were, Yousef loved caring for them, and more than that, Yousef loved that the children loved him as much as he loved them.

It's absolute mayhem at the kindergarten today, though, and not one of the days when Yousef can marvel upon the love he has for his work. Lilly and Jonah couldn't come in for their work shifts and so the staff is three people down, including Yousef's aunt who is incredibly sick. Yousef had already agreed to work double time today but he can feel twinges of regret now: the day has just began and it is already incredibly tiring.

Yousef juggles three plates of food in his hands, trying not to trip over toys that are scattered all over the floor. 5-years old Maria Hansen follows him like his shadow, barely reaching up to his knees, picking up the toys that Yousef manages to dodge and the ones that collide with his feet.

"Yousef", she mumbles behind him. Yousef keeps walking and turns his head a bit to look at her. "Yes?"

"I don't want to be overly _pessimistic_ ", she says with exaggerated emphasis on her words, pausing to grin widely at using the big word that Yousef taught her yesterday. Yousef grins back at her in acknowledgment. "But today is _crazy_." She bends down to pick up a toy and nearly trips over her own skirt.

Yousef smiles and keeps walking. "No, you're not being pessimistic today, Mar," he says. "You're being perfectly  _realistic_."

Maria stops in her path and thinks about the new word Yousef has thrown at her. She nods to herself and begins to follow him again.

Maria Hansen bonded with Yousef Acar over the need to learn new things. She had a voracious appetite for knowledge, and Yousef was always willing to feed it. He taught her new words, he told her random facts that she absorbed rapidly, he taught her about value systems and religions and most importantly, he gave her books to read. Her favorite, by far, are the Grimm Brothers' fairytales.

Yousef enters into the small dining room and kneels down in front of three five year olds, raising his eyebrows at them as they attempt to fight to sit in the middle. "Boys," he admonishes them, as he sets the plate of food in front of them. "Daniel stop it", Yousef says, arranging their cutlery. Daniel, by far the naughtiest of them all, and also Yousef's secret favorite among the fraternal triplets, looks at Yousef innocently, raises his hands up, and politely shifts to the side, all the while grinning.

"You too, Oddvar", Yousef tells the other two who are still fighting. "Stop troubling Leif, _I mean it_." Oddvar huffs and let's go of Leif, shuffling to the side, annoyed.

The middle seat is the hotspot. Even though the entire kindergarten area is air conditioned, the middle seat lies directly in line of the vents and also directly in front of the television. Usually, Daniel occupies the seat, but today Leif, the meekest of the three, seems to have taken over.

Yousef arranges their food and gestures for them to eat, constantly checking on Daniel who keeps grinning as he pops a pea into his mouth, his black floppy hair lending him an impish look.

Maria strolls in after Yousef and curls her nose at Daniel. She points at him. "Didn't get the middle seat today, did you?", she taunts him.

Yousef suppresses a smile. It's no secret that Daniel and Maria don't get along with each other. They would have, Yousef is sure, if not for Yousef. Most of the scuffles between Daniel and Maria originated from their intense need to compete for Yousef's affections. Maria always blamed Daniel for any wrongdoing (which in all honestly, Daniel was usually involved in) and went ahead to tell Yousef all about it, and Daniel always claimed that Maria was simply wanting to take Yousef's favor (which she was) and that she was a whiny old grandma.

Daniel looks up at Maria, smiling. "Nuh uh, grandma."

Maria points a threatening finger at him. "Don't call me that."

Daniel shrugs casually.

"I'm telling you," Maria says. "Don't call me that. I'm not a grandma!"

Oddvar is so focused on the TV that he nearly drops his spoon. Yousef catches it in time and helps Oddvar eat.

Daniel smirks at Maria. "Or what?"

Maria huffs and then takes the spoon from his hand and flicks the bowl of porridge at him.

Yousef lunges between them to stop the scuffle but it's too late. Instead, Yousef lands right in the middle of everything. The hot porridge splashes against his t-shirt and he quickly yanks the t-shirt away from his torso, trying to prevent any burns. The shirt sticks to his stomach and he stands up abruptly and yanks the t-shirt off, balling it up in his hand and throwing it in the trash bin. His eyes water automatically as the cold air hits his damp abdomen.

"Oh I'm so sorry", Maria's voice quivers. "I didn't mean to hurt you Yousef." She places a trembling hand on his leg.

Daniel, Leif and Oddvar stand up too, alarmed by the mess. Leif is on the verge of tears.

Yousef bends a little and grimaces. "I'm not going to excuse your behavior," he says to Maria and looks around to check on the triplets. "But thank god nobody got severely hurt."

He steps over the small chairs and tables, barechested, and turns to the huddle of four children for a brief second. "Don't go anywhere. Sit here and eat, okay?" The children nod rapidly.

Yousef walks out of the dining room and fishes his phone out of his pocket, examining the red spot blooming on his stomach. He quickly texts Elias.

> **My shirt got damaged and I forgot to bring a new one today. Could you bring me a shirt from home? ASAP**

Bubbles pop up on the text screen as Yousef heads for the kitchen and applies an ice pack on the red area. He flinches as the cold ice makes contact with his skin but he keeps the ice pressed to his abdomen.

> **Elias: I couldn't hear you.**

Yousef sighs and begins typing again.

> **Could you get me a new shirt from home?**  
>  **Please?**

Elias replies almost instantly.

> **Elias: Be there in 5.**

The Bakkoush house was hardly any distance away from the kindergarten and Yousef was comfortable wearing Elias' shirt as long as it was clean and not procured from the treasure chest that was Elias' bedroom floor.

Yousef cups his phone in his palm and puts it down on the kitchen slab near the sink. His abdomen is starting to hurt now, little prickles rising across the edges on his skin. Yousef grimaces as the icy water spreads to the rapidly and alarmingly reddening area.

He turns and walks to the other side of the kitchen, getting himself a glass of water. He's drinking the water when he hears noises from outside.

_Is it Maria and Daniel again?_

He huffs and starts to walk outside but is stopped in his tracks, standing right in the middle of the kitchen.

Sometimes, he's been told, Yousef freezes. Mutta calls it the "I'm too cold to function" reflex. Adam, accurately, calls it the "I'm in love" reflex.

Yousef's eyes scan over a wide-eyed Sana Bakkoush, standing at the entrance of the kitchen in the yellow light, her lips stained a bright red, a black hijab, a light pink jacket around her shoulders and a t-shirt balled in her hand. Seeing the t-shirt breaks the spell and Yousef jerks abruptly.

"Halla", he says softly.

Sana blinks. "Hi." She says, her eyes glazed over. Yousef blinks in confusion. _Is something wrong?_

He looks down at his hand clutching the ice and he suddenly realizes he's bare chested. He hastily puts the ice away and raises his hand out to Sana for the t-shirt. Sana's eyes seemed to be plastered to his arms and he has no idea why. Maybe she finds this disrespectful. He takes the shirt from her and is just about to put it through his head when Sana stops him.

"Wait wait wait", she says, slurring her words together as she attempts to speak super fast.

Yousef stops right in the motion, just the shirt through his neck.

Sana takes a step forward and Yousef feels the air constrict in the room. "What's that?", she says, her finger pointing to the blooming red on his torso.

"Oh, I just got burned I think", Yousef replies and begins to wear the t-shirt again. "I've already put ice on it--"

"No no no", Sana cuts him off. "That's a proper burn, you need to treat it quickly." Suddenly her voice changes tenor and she sounds incredibly mature. And that does nothing to calm Yousef's frayed edges.

"Do you have a first aid kit here?", she asks.

"Yes!", Maria chimes in from behind Sana, standing right outside the kitchen door.

"Do you want me to get it?", Daniel adds, appearing from behind the side wall, as well.

Sana blinks at the two kids appearing from out of nowhere, when two more emerge. Leif and Oddvar stumble into the kitchen, huffing and puffing. Leif hands Sana a dark blue bag. "We thought you'd need it", Oddvar says, breathless from his and Leif's sprint to the storage room.

Sana smiles at Oddvar and Oddvar blushes a deep red, smiling shyly. In that moment, Yousef wants to be Oddvar so bad, it isn't even funny.

Sana quickly places the bag on the counter and whips out a tube from it. She throws the tube at Yousef who catches it deftly and orders him to apply it over the red area. He grimaces as he spreads the ointment over his torso, and Sana looks up at him and scrunches her face.

"Here", she says, handing him a gauze to paste over the ointment for healing. While Yousef applies the gauze and finally wears the t shirt in all its entirety, Sana marches to the water cooler with a glass, and then walks to Yousef, a white pill in her hand.

"It's a painkiller", she says by way of explanation and hands it to Yousef. She looks at him expectantly and glances away sharply from his throat as Yousef swallows the water.

"Thanks", Yousef says, going to keep the glass in the sink.

Sana shrugs.

"Thank you for coming too", Yousef adds, washing his the ointment off his fingers. "I texted Elias--"

"I know", Sana cuts him off and sighs. "But he sent his slave of the week, instead."

Yousef smiles slowly and leans against the kitchen counter. "Poor bet, yes?", he asks, a smile lingering in his words.

Sana suppresses a smile and turns her head to the side, refusing to acknowledge it.

"Are you going to stay?", Yousef asks, careful to keep the hope out of his voice. "I mean, only if you want to", he adds. And then he backtracks. "You're more than welcome to stay though," he gestures vaguely with his hands. "I mean, everybody here is really friendly and it's all cool and the food is good and you can stay but only if you want to, you know--"

Sana laughs. Yousef shuts up sheepishly and smiles back.

"I have an exam tomorrow", Sana says. "I need to leave." She frowns slightly.

"Oh okay", Yousef says and nods. "Sure sure." He pauses. "Well, all the best then."

Sana shakes her head and smiles a bit. "Thanks."

She turns to leave and gives a small wave to Yousef. "Bye".

"Bye", Yousef says as she steps outside the kitchen, smiles and waves goodbye to the four kids crowding the area right outside the kitchen and leaves.

Yousef stared after her longingly. Trust him to make a fool of himself. He sighs and straightens up, his eyes falling to the four children standing there staring wide eyed at him.

Yousef raises his eyebrows at them.

Maria seems to shake out of her stupor first. "She's so pretty", Maria whispers.

Yousef smiles a bit and nods agreeingly. Daniel walks up to him excitedly. He turns back to Lief and Oddvar and Maria and then turns to Yousef. "Do you like her, Yousef?"

Yousef stills.

Lief catches him freezing and jumps up and down excitedly.

"Yousef loves Sana!", he exclaims excitedly.

Yousef's eyes widen. He begins to deny it but Oddvar cuts him off. His eyes are dreamy. "It's okay Yousef", he advises. "I'm in love with her too."

He raises as high he can on his toes and pats Yousef on the thigh, turning on his heel and walking out with all three of them in tow, leaving a startled and wide eyed Yousef Acar standing in their wake.

Yousef blinks. Is he this transparent?

Yousef takes a deep breath. _Oh no._

 

 **#5.**  
  
The music pumps through the room, loud and crass and resonating through the walls. It's Kanye shouting and spitting words into the room, and then it's Kygo's beats reverberating into the pit of Yousef's ear.

Yousef looks around while maintaining small talk with Noora. He laughs at something Noora says but he has no idea what she just said. He laughed because Adam and Eva laughed. Yousef is trying to act super casual while he looks around the room with X-ray vision and he knows he's not doing very well because he sees Adam giving him the side eye.

Yousef looks at where Elias is, and then at the group of blonde girls by the side.

She's nowhere.

"Yousef", Adam calls sharply, directing Yousef's attention towards himself. "Noora was asking about the kindergarten you work at", he says pointedly.

Yousef nods distractedly. "Yeah, it's pretty cool", he tells Noora and then tilts his head again to look at the other side of the room.

She's not there either.

Yousef sees a hint of black hijab among the crowd and nearly rises up from his seat on the couch but is yanked down by Adam. He turns swiftly to look at Adam. Eva and Noora are talking amongst themselves. Adam leans towards Yousef and whispers under his breath, "if maybe you could be a _little_ more obvious, we could get you married to Sana right about _now_."

Yousef blinks, takes a deep breath and settles back against the couch.

Yousef sighs, his body itching to go talk to Sana. He leans to the side and accidentally knocks two balloons off the side table.

Adam, Noora and Eva turn towards him. "Excuse Yousef", Adam says. "He doesn't like balloons."

Eva gasps. "No way!"

Yousef gives a small laugh. "Yes way."

"But Elias brought so many!", Eva says.

"Yes and I don't like a single one of them", Yousef replies. "What's the point of balloons if you can't burst them?"

Noora and Adam laugh.

Eva mock sighs. "I can't process this", she says, getting up. "I need a drink to ward off this unjustified balloon hatred."

Adam rises up too. "I'll join you."

Eva turns to Yousef and Noora, still sitting on the couch. "Do you guys want beer too?"

"No thanks", Yousef replies with a smile. "I don't drink."

" _Oh_ , Noora doesn't either", Eva says and skips to the bar, Adam following her.

"You don't drink either?", Noora asks, surprise coloring her tone.

"Nope, not a fan", Yousef replies smiling. "What about you?"

"Same", Noora says, clutching her apple juice to her chest.

Yousef looks around; still no sign of her.

He turns back to Noora with a sigh. "So you study at Hartvig Nissen too?"

"Yep", Noora nods. "A '99er, just like Sana." Noora smiles.

Yousef freezes. _Why would she say that?_

Noora continues talking, though. "What about you?," she asks. Yousef sighs inaudibly and relaxes into the couch. He is so wound up that he's imagining everything to be about him and Sana.

"I graduated from Elvebakken last year", he replies. "Right now, I'm working at a kindergarten and I'm pretty sure I'm going to start University next fall."

Noora nods. "What are you planning to study at university?"

"Maybe education?", Yousef replies. "I'm not sure yet. I mean, I want to venture into child psychology--", Yousef shrugs. "But who knows what the fuck am I doing with my life."

Noora laughs, clutching a balloon string. "Relatable."

_"Yousef"_

Yousef turns as a panicked Elias approaches him, pushing through the people amalgamated together. Yousef instantly goes on high alert. "What is it?", Yousef asks, standing up.

"I can't find Sana", Elias speaks under his breath.

"What?", Yousef says, unable to hear him over the cacophony of noises in the apartment, trying to step over the beer cans littering the floor.

"I can't find Sana!", Elias yells in Yousef's ear, loud enough for Noora to hear him. Noora's eyes widen in alarm and she stands up abruptly too.

"What do you mean you can't find Sana", Noora yells over the music.

Elias looks around helplessly. "She's not here in the apartment, Mutta and I have searched everywhere."

"The fuck, bro?", Yousef exclaims. He pushes past the block of people standing right in the middle of the room and stumbles through the crowd, Noora and Elias hot on his heels. He yanks at the door knob and steps outside the apartment, moving down the stairs. The cool air hits him in the gut and he breathes deeply.

He finds Adam standing downstairs, phone to his ear, rapidly trying to call Sana. "Her phone is busy", Adam says as soon as he spots Elias and Yousef.

Adam pockets his phone. "Mutta and Mikael have taken the train back to Briskeby to look for her and that guy from Elvebakken is lending his car to us so that we can search for her."

"Have you asked Chris, Vilde or Eva if they've seen Sana?", Noora asks.

"We couldn't find Vilde and Chris but we asked Eva and she didn't know", Elias replies.

Noora turns to Yousef. "Let's go look for Chris and Vilde", Noora says. "They might know."

Yousef nods and turns to Elias and Adam. "Text me if you find her." He turns on his heel and follows Noora back into the party.

"I told you this area was too fucking weird man." Yousef hears Elias murmuring. Yes they knew that. And yes, Yousef and Mutta had objected to it. But no, Elias and Adam and Mikael had been too turnt to party with Sana's friends that they had completely disregarded this factor and shut them down.

Yousef walks with quick steps up to the party and slides himself in front of Noora; a taller guy would be able to part a crowd more easily.

Noora and him go to the room that's just by the entrance, but it's just three guys smoking weed in there. Noora tries to call Vilde and Chris but they don't pick up; she doubts they would even hear their phone ringing in this loud music. Yousef and Noora try the three restrooms but they are either filled with people making out or people having sex. They try the kitchen and the master bedrooms and the study, but it's all just people talking to each other.

No Sana.

Yousef's stress level hits the roof. He can feel his ears vibrating with the intensity of his anxiety.

Noora lets out a small yelp and catches the wall edge to right herself. Yousef turns, half disoriented from tension, and reaches out to help her. Noora untangles her leg from the bag straps that lie on the floor and nearly falls again as the wall that she's leaning against turns out to be a door that swings open. Yousef catches her from falling, and pulls her back up.

They both look at the dimly lit stairs that lead beyond the door. Yousef starts towards the stairs in a haste. He climbs up a flight and sees a simple metal door. He pushes past the door and stops abruptly, Noora slamming into his back with an "oof".

Cool breeze blows past him and he can smell a slight tinge of cigarette smoke wafting through the air. He's on the terrace.

Noora stumbles out from behind him and blinks, confused. She sidesteps, squints into the distance and abruptly, points at a silhouette of two figures huddled together near the ledge. "Vilde!", Noora shouts. "Eva!"

The two figures turn and Yousef nearly stumbles over his steps in his haste to get to Eva and Vilde.

"Have you seen Sana?", he asks both Eva and Vilde, a bit breathless.

Vilde looks at Yousef wide-eyed and then to Noora. And then back to Yousef.

"Ya", Vilde replies. "Chris and her left a while ago."

Eva frowns at Yousef and Noora's taut faces. "They told Vilde and left", Eva says, a bit confused at their panicked reactions. She lifts her phone up to show Yousef and Noora. "We can even track their Uber, _see_."

Yousef squints at the small car-on-the-map imagery.

Vilde and Eva look towards each other and then at Yousef and Noora, consternation etched on their faces. "What happened?", Vilde asks them, concerned.

Noora lets out a deep exhale. "The boys couldn't find Sana and they tried to look for you and Chris and they asked Eva and she didn't know, and they tried calling her and she didn't pick up and so they freaked the fuck out and are just out there--", Noora gestures to the open air with her hands. "Looking for Sana", she lets it all out in a rush.

Eva's eyebrows are up to her hairline. "Adam asked me but I thought he was just asking where Sana was, as in where she was _right now_ ", she says. "And I didn't know, _so_." Eva shrugs helplessly.

Yousef breathes deeply through his nose, trying to control his anger and suppressing his fear.

"Why didn't you answer your phone Vilde?", Yousef asks through his teeth.

"It's on silent", Vilde replies instantly, startled at Yousef's tone.

Yousef nods tightly. "Noora, text Elias and tell him about Sana", he says and fishes his phone out and shoots a quick text to Mikael and Mutta, asking them to return.

" _Oh_ ," Eva mutters and squints at the phone. "Their car has vanished."

Noora's head snaps up from her phone screen and she looks at Yousef, wide eyed. "It's just the Internet-", she starts but Yousef is faster. He snatches the phone from Eva's hands and stares murderously at the screen, almost as if threatening the car to show up.

The car doesn't.

" _Fuck_ ", he exclaims, nearly smashing Eva's phone on the ground. "It's two _fucking_ am."

He looks at all three of them with daggered eyes, his cheekbones sharpening with anger. "Who thought it was a good idea to let Sana leave alone at this time of the fucking night?"

Eva, Noora and Vilde freeze.

"Um, Chris is also with her", Vilde says in a small voice.

Yousef turns his glare on her and Vilde nearly shrinks under it. "Let me _re_ phrase", he repeats through his teeth. "Who thought it was a good idea to let Sana leave at this time of the fucking night?"

Noora clears her throat lightly. "I mean--", she says, wary of Yousef. "The words _'independent woman'_ come to mind."

Eva sniffs. "And Sana does have a history of whooping ass."

Vilde swallows. "And I mean, Chris and her are together."

Yousef breathes thinly through his nose. He relaxes his shoulders a little. He shouldn't be so tense, they've found Sana anyway.

"What did Elias say?", he turns to Noora.

"He says he's turning back", Noora replies. Her phone buzzes with a new message. "Oh, him and Adam _are_ back."

Yousef nods and checks his phone to see Mikael and Mutta's affirmative replies. "Mutta and Mikael are coming back too", he says and turns to leave the terrace.

"Uh, Yousef", Eva calls. Yousef turns to look back at her.

Eva looks at Vilde and then sends a look to Noora. Yousef turns to see Noora shaking her head at Eva.

"What?", he snaps, too tense for this.

"Uh--", Eva says and then stops, shuffling on her feet. Yousef raises his eyebrows.

"We were thinking", Vilde says and then flicks her gaze down at the ground to avoid looking at Yousef. She rocks on the balls of her feet, looking at Eva and then blinks up at Yousef. "We were thinking that _maybe_ you are a little bit too overprotective of Sana and _maybe_ its because you like her and _maybe_ not in a friend way but in a more than a friend way _maybe_ like a girlfriend way--", Vilde rushes and trips over her words.

Noora cuts her off. "Do you like Sana?", she asks him, point blank, her shoulders squared.

Yousef blinks. His shoulders are tight and his back is bunched up with tension. His nerve endings are frazzled and all he wants to do is see Sana anywhere but safe. The cold wind creates a whooshing noise in his ears and he feels his fingers freeze from the cold.

He looks at Noora and Eva and then Vilde. And then he turns on his heel to leave, giving them no answer.

As he is about to reach the door, Eva's voice rings clear across the terrace. "The uber car is back!", she shouts. "They've reached home."

Yousef doesn't turn to acknowledge her, instead giving her the thumbs-up behind his back.

As soon as he is about to shut the door behind him, Noora's shout reaches him again. "We promise we won't tell Sana that you like her!" Followed by loud giggles.

Yousef shuts the door with a low thud.

He tilts his head to the side and breathes deeply. He blinks, and letting out a small smile, he walks back into the party.

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> #5 is a different scenario imagination of the party in the fy faen scene. 
> 
> All the love.


End file.
